I love when my mother comes for a visit. Aside from her help with the kids and seeing how much fun they have with her; what I enjoy the most is our mother-daughter conversations.
Today we talked about feeling guilty about our happiness. We each have several friends who are not so happy with certain things in their lives and it saddens us. I am going to try to be careful here and not step in anyone’s toes… I’ll try.. but know that dancing in stilettos is kinda hard.
We specifically had a conversation about how she feels when she talks about her amazing life with other people (although she herself doesn’t mention the word ‘amazing’ in the conversation). Let me first tell you that my mother is the kind of person who has short term memory for the bad things in life. Forgiveness, while a difficult thing to do, is second nature to her. She is an incredible woman. Can you imagine living your life without regrets and shoulders not weighed down by anger or conflict? So admirable.
Our conversation got me thinking… why should someone who is happy feel guilty because other people are choosing to live with a victim mentality? Yes, life hands us all a different hand… but it’s the same deck of cards. It’s how you play your game that determines the score.
If you are happy, you should spread happiness. Let people know what it looks like and what is possible. If you are financially fortunate you should be the example for others that are working hard to get to where you are. Just because someone is happy, it doesn’t mean that she hasn’t suffered or had difficulties in her life. If we can learn from our mistakes…. why can’t we learn from success?
For my mom, the glass is always
half full. Why shouldn’t it be for everyone else? My grandma used to say: “make your bed and lay in it. If you don’t like it, change the sheets.”